Thursday, September 26, 2013


This post was written by my incredible mother, Anne. She is the strongest woman I know and the best mom that the world could ever offer a girl. I've gleaned from her wisdom all my life so it seems selfish to not share it with you today.


When I was a little girl, my doting grandmother taught me this rhyme so I could recite it, in a flirtatious manner, one hand on hip, the other waving “stop”, to entertain her friends:

“I’m a cute little girl, with a cute little figure, Stand back boys, ‘til I get a little bigger!”

No lie!  Unfortunately, I grew up thinking that the most important thing in life was having a boyfriend/husband.   Oh yeah, and I had to be “cute” for this to happen!  Need for approval, fear of rejection, negative body image and sublimating my own voice, were demons I felt but did not have the where-with-all to name and cast out.  Thankfully, I was blessed with a family that loved me and a strong (even as a little child) belief in God to undergird and point me in the right direction.

Jump ahead many years. . . I got married, had two children, a satisfying career, opportunities and challenges, then my husband died of cancer.  When I stepped back into the world of dating, I discovered those old demons were still around.  One whispered over and over, “how do you expect to find a man now that you are no longer young and cute?”  I sought approval, feared rejection, sublimated my own voice, ignored my guides and suffered the consequences.  Thanks to good counsel and spiritual direction, I was able to name, claim and cast out those old behaviors and beliefs, finally!

Recently, I bought a silver necklace with a tiny circle on it to symbolize wholeness and eternity.  It is a proclamation to that woman in the mirror, if no one else:  “I am complete”.  I do not  need a man to complete or fulfill me.  There is not a hole or void in my life  because I am single.  I am not alone.  God is with me – in my past, present and future.     

I WISH I had known this at age 4, 12, 16, 21, 30, 40, 50 . . . .  I wish I had not wasted so much time, money, physical and emotional energy worrying about my appearance and what others, especially men, thought of me. 

I like myself so much more now!  I am strong, confident, independent, intelligent, capable, kind, generous, fun, adventurous, spiritual, creative and content.  I can take care of myself.  I spend time alone and without being lonely.  God and I are a lot closer since I’ve learned to let HIM be the “man” in my life and love the me He knows.

Notice I did not say one thing about being “cute”.  J

Mom didn't say anything about being cute but you can see for yourself, she has always been a beauty. I am glad she knows now where that beauty comes from- inside.